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Best of The Tempest 2019: Love edition. Here’s what we loved, felt, breathed for

It’s been one hell of a year. A year filled with love, pain, hope, anxiety, new beginnings, endings, and everything else folding itself into the spaces between them. It was the year of Instagram relationships, lonely millennials, standing up for yourself, confronting your mental health, experiencing new things and we have all these narratives that screamed for breaking boundaries and barriers.

We had a whole lot of love, some breakdowns, growth and trying to accept ourselves for who we really are. There was an inherent connection to self love, working through relationships, redefining and inspiring ourselves. This was the year of us.

These are some of the stories that filled us with love, expanded our hearts, and pierced through our beings:

1. “Love in the time of Instagram” by Iman Saleem

Love in the time of Instagram

Relationships are constantly being redefined and Iman writes about trying to be in a millennial relationship – the ups and downs – the spark – the miscommunication. It’s all here, and it’s yours for the taking.

2. “Even with social media, millennials are officially the loneliest generation” by Anonymous

Even with social media, millennials are officially the loneliest generation

Why is it that we seem to live in a world that thrives on connection and yet making real connections is so seemingly difficult? Anon writes about their inherent loneliness, connecting it to genetic makeup, state of mind, social media and varying types of interaction.

3. “I’m so happy my parents got divorced” by Alice Draper

I’m so happy my parents got divorced

Every family culminates in different types of relationships. We have our family of origin, the family that we find along the way, and then the family we choose. Alice pens her experience of a child of divorce and how it helped her grow closer to certain family members.

4. “10 amazing disabled leaders and activists you absolutely need to follow on Twitter” by Julia Metraux

10 amazing disabled leaders and activists you absolutely need to follow on Twitter

Julia writes about some disabled activists that were doing some badass things – read this article to find out more.

5. “It took years to go on my first date – I still don’t know why” by Karis Rogerson

It took years to go on my first date – I still don’t know why

Let’s be real, dating in 2019 has not been easy. Missed connections, weird signals, social media taking over – can a girl just get asked out on a nice date? Is that too much to ask? Karis talks about the first time she was asked out on a date, and you need to read her story now!

This was the year of us.

6. “I slept with a guy who thought he knew me better than myself” by Hannah Adler

I slept with a guy who thought he knew me better than myself

In 2020, let’s vow to stop listening to others’ opinions about OUR bodies. Hannah recounts an experience where her partner claimed he knew her orgasms better than she did. The AUDACITY.

7. “This is how it felt to live with severe anxiety – and how I finally won” by Anonymous

This is how it felt to live with severe anxiety – and how I finally won

I’m proud of this year for finally being the one that allowed so many of us to begin speaking about our mental health openly. Anon talks about their battle with anxiety – the rise, the climax, and finally – the confrontation.

It was a ridiculous wish. The more I let my anxiety rule my life, the bigger it grew.

8. “It’s time we stop romanticizing all forms of suffering” by Sana Panjwani

It’s time we stop romanticizing all forms of suffering

There almost seems to be this creepy glorification of having depression or anxiety that has been sprouting around social media. Sana fiercely tackles the subject with her narrative about online trends and their effect on our mental wellbeing.

9. “Just because I haven’t been with a woman doesn’t mean I’m not bi” by Anonymous

Just because I haven’t been with a woman doesn’t mean I’m not bi

Anonymous delves into their story of trying to figure out their sexuality – it’s real, relatable and powerful.

I never want to be the reason someone ends up getting hurt because I selfishly decide to explore my needs. I never want to treat someone as my ‘bi-curious experiment’.

10. “To the mothers who chose to wait” by

To the mothers who chose to wait

At the end of the day – the power of choice is everything, Katherine’s personal narrative brings us close to her as she recounts her experience of finding out she was pregnant and having the right to choose.

11.  “I was abused by my Quran teacher and I’m not the only one” by Mehvish Irshad

I was abused by my Quran teacher and I’m not the only one

In the wake of #MeToo, so many powerful women have come out with their stories. Mehvish opens up about her personal experience in this piece.

12. “How taking naked selfies made me love every one of my curves” by

How taking naked selfies made me love every one of my curves

Empowerment is what you take from it and for Beatriz – it came from naked selfies.

Seeing curvy girl selfies on Instagram only fueled my need to express myself. Embracing every step of my self-love journey — for the past year, it’s a constant rollercoaster of abundance and scarcity with very little room for anything in between.

13. “Everything finally made sense when I accepted my asexuality”  by Anonymous

Everything finally made sense when I accepted my asexuality

​Acceptance is our 2020 motto – we hope to grow into the new year – accepting all the pieces of ourselves that we’ve been told not to. Anonymous writes about feeling different as a child, and how romantic connection is something they crave but when it comes to physical connection – masturbation is the best it gets.

But once the climax is achieved, and I’ve had the orgasm I need, I would have got all the sexual satisfaction I want, and I have never wanted anything more than that.

14. “Choosing to be a traditional wife isn’t a threat to my feminism” by Bisma Parvez

Choosing to be a traditional wife isn’t a threat to my feminism

Feminism has so many different definitions – and Bisma speaks about how being a traditional wife is a part of her definition of it.

15. “Your self-worth is not defined by your relationship status” by Maheen Humayun

Your self-worth is not defined by your relationship status

The world around us is always trying to put us into boxes, to define us according to some type of formula. Maheen writes about accepting your relationship status, and giving society a fuck you when they try to define you for your singledom.

For 2020, your self worth should be defined by you – how much you’ve grown, you’ve inspired, you’ve tried. Even if it’s one small step, you should applaud yourself for it. Every journey towards moving and changing and growing is inspiring – and we’re here to share those stories with you.

We hope you found some love and healing along the way.

We sure did.

By Maheen Humayun

Maheen Humayun is a writer, poet and educator based in Karachi, Pakistan. She has a BA in English Literature and Creative Writing. In addition to working as the Senior Editor for Love, she teaches literature in the day, and writes her own at night. Maheen has written for The Express Tribune and Dawn as well and her novella, "Special," was published in 2012. When she isn't writing for The Tempest, you can find her drinking copious amounts of black coffee, working on crushing the patriarchy, learning digital art, and doing spoken word poetry.