Halloween has come to mean a lot of different things to different people. Despite it’s ancient Celtic origins as a festival to commemorate the ghosts of the dead returning to earth for a day (fun!), it has now become Spooky Season, a month-long celebration for every child who didn’t have nightmares for months after watching the 1990 movie adaptation of Roald Dahl’s TheWitches.
But some of us – the ones who were profoundly traumatized by the movie and as a result developed a deep mistrust of nearly every adult woman in our lives – just aren’t spooky by nature. We don’t want to dress up as killer clowns or The Nun, mostly because we don’t want our hearts to stop every time we look into any reflective surface. When it comes to Halloween costumes, we only have two good options: Disney characters and memes. For those of us who don’t want to upstage our nieces by going as Moana, here, hot off the internet, is every great 2019 meme as a Halloween costume.
Everyone and their mum knows this one. Applicable to nearly all situations, easy to remember, and the GIF version is always in the ‘Trending’ section of the Whatsapp GIF keyboard. I use it every time my hand slips on my laptop and accidentally presses the ‘Pay & Complete Order’ button and Boris Johnson probably sends it into the Parliament group chat every time he extends the Brexit deadline.
The Tough Guy Entrance meme requires three things and all three are attitude. Note, in the video, how his facial expression remains pretty constant, although the eventual camera close up allows us to see the deepening distaste in his eyes as he scans the room, reminiscent of me walking into each one of my Postcolonial Literature classes only to see yet another white lecturer.
Keke! Loved her in that church choir movie with Dolly Parton and Queen Latifah, love her even more now. You probably have all the components of this outfit in your wardrobe anyway, and “sorry to this man” is a phrase that lends itself particularly well to a night out, where you can repeat it to every man who tries dancing up behind you groin-first.
Volume is really the make-or-break of this costume. If you have anywhere between 29 and 49 friends willing to commit to purchasing this exact outfit and moving as a single unit throughout the night, then congratulations! If not, hit me up.
This one may be a little bit older, but I would argue that the time it’s had to marinate on the back burners of our collective consciousness would make it a nice little rarity amidst the hordes of couples dressed (hopefully ironically) as Ellen and George Bush.
Everyone loves a trio: the Powerpuff Girls, Charlie’s Angels, Destiny’s Child. But wait – what’s that? You say you’re not fully sold on any of these options? You say you’d like to combine the familial dynamic of the first trio and the athletic prowess of the second with the rhythmic capabilities of Beyoncé, Kelly and Michelle? Here! You! Go!
Another great couple’s costume option, especially if you want to put in minimum effort – one of you literally only needs a blanket and side bangs. The other one of you just needs to look like you’re perpetually on the verge of tears. Which, honestly, is also pretty easy.