Weddings

4 wedding day feelings every bride experiences (that nobody ever tells you)

You may (or may not) remember the food, the napkin and plate settings, or even your shoes - but you will remember how it all made you felt.

Weddings really matter to people, despite the fact that it seems more people want to opt out of the institution or really delay it. Big, small, casual formal, fat, over-the-top, those who still want to get married care about the big day. They want to make it theirs and nobody else’s. Wedding days are not just about feeding your guests anymore. They are that chance to display the two personalities that were brought together to make such a big celebration in the first place.

Yet, in all of that preoccupation, the question always comes down to: Is this for the couple? Or for everyone else?

You may (or may not remember) the food, the napkin and plate settings, or even your shoes - but you will remember how it all made you felt. Click To Tweet

Let’s hope it is not the latter because that only makes for a day you will never care to remember. These four feels remind us all why weddings can be beautiful when we put all of the clutter aside.

1.  Silliness

silly GIF
[Image Description: Woman activating swag by doing moves on the sidewalk.] via Giphy

Maybe you are a very put-together person and you want to present that at your wedding. You had a rehearsal dinner to make sure everything was choreographed. The emcee had it put together. Everyone is on board and this show is going to be the best one you will deliver!

However, what I have found at weddings is I absolutely adore the screw-ups in the middle of it all. While it is great to rehearse things, allowing for flow and improvisation through the night is what allows for everyone to laugh at themselves, including the bride and groom.

2. Authenticity

vh1beautybar be yourself GIF by VH1
[Image Description: A woman from VH1’s beauty bar saying she’s weird.] via Giphy

If you have to ask your bride or groom to do something a certain way (at least constantly), then you are cramping their style. I remember when I was more than excited to perform a Bollywood dance number with my bridesmaids (91 bobby pins and too many pounds of veil weight on my head included) than my husband. He is not a fan of Bollywood, and he could not make himself dance to it.

If you have to ask your bride or groom to do something a certain way (at least constantly), then you are cramping their style Click To Tweet

In fact, he just did not like the idea of doing any dance choreographed. I heard him, and so I asked him how he would feel jumping in at the end to dance freestyle to old-school hip-hop (more specifically, Jagged Edge’s, Let’s Get Married). Lo and behold, that was more acceptable and the moment was too many feels.

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3. Unapologeticness

[Image Description: A woman with her hands on her hips saying “I do what I want.] via Giphy

It is your day, and if you have to deal with sneering relatives or just toxic people in general, no f*** given is the best way to go!  They will not really remember it, even if it takes them four years (in which case it’s about them, not you).

I remember a relative walked into our wedding and had the nerve to tell me that the veil was too heavy for my head and that I was crooked.  What I realized was that his comment was a way to express his dissatisfaction with the fact that our Desi Muslim wedding had dancing (the co-ed kind with no clubby bumping and grinding, mind you).

It is your day, and if you have to deal with sneering relatives or just toxic people in general, no f*** given is the best way to go! Click To Tweet

Let’s just say he was sitting in his chair looking like a cranky fart the whole night, anyway, while I did me. He chose to be a stink, but I was not about to let it ruin MY night!

4.  Gratefulness

happy my heart GIF
[Image Description: Stephen Colbert with eyeliner running down his face, crying happy tears.] via Giphy

Seeing those people across the room, being your cheerleaders is the best feeling at a wedding. And I am not talking about the audience that goes around criticizing your make-up or the food. I am talking about the people who step up and celebrate you! Being able to see your truest of friends reunited at your wedding after everyone has moved across the country or the world is an irreplaceable feeling.  Maybe all of them cannot be there due to the fact that life is constantly changing, but to still feel their presence is just as important.

Being able to see your truest of friends reunited at your wedding after everyone has moved across the country or the world is an irreplaceable feeling. Click To Tweet

Your wedding day is about you and your partner or spouse.  Any hiccups that you may face will only become memories worth forgetting.  Not to mention, when it comes to the actual day, enjoying the moment makes it all the more real.

Saba Danawala

Saba Danawala

Writing yogi and traveler immersed in all issues public health and social justice. Transplanted to Pakistan by way of DC, New Delhi, and Texas. Seasoned in the game of questioning systematic gender and social norms. Pragmatically idealizes a world populated with more self-aware and empathetic human beings.

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