Identity, Life

22 things every millennial witch totally understands

Witchcraft and chill. What better way to get to know your date?

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Witchcraft is becoming increasingly popular among millennials. Many millennials are identifying as witches in terms of culture, religion or spirituality. More and more of us are leaving atheism and monotheistic religions in favor of Paganism, Wicca and other forms of witchcraft. In 2009, ABC noted that 342,000 people identified as Wiccans, compared to 134,000 in 2001. In more recent years, the #witchblr tag on Tumblr and the #witch tag on Instagram have both become incredibly popular. News outlets from The Guardian to the Pacific Standard have noticed the increase in people who identify as witches, particularly young women.

Why is it so popular? It could be because we’ve come to associate witchcraft with feminism and equality, or maybe because we’re looking to the otherworldly to solve the problems faced by our generation. It could also be because iconic pieces of pop culture like Harry Potter, The Craft, and Charmed have piqued our curiosity when it comes to magic. Either way, witches are all over social media, and more and more people are becoming interested in the esoteric.

All witches are different because there are so many different traditions, factions, and philosophies – but most of us still have a great deal in common! If you’re one of the many millennials who’ve come to embrace witchcraft, you’ll probably relate to most, if not all, of these situations.

1. When someone breaks your BFF’s heart, you have to resist the urge to curse them.

A GIF from the movie, "The Love Witch", where the main character is about to kill and sacrifice a man.
Pinterest

Most witches don’t believe in cursing others, but karma spells are usually fair game. Don’t test us!

2. Your skeptical friends bash astrology – but then lose their keys and hook up with their exes during Mercury retrograde.

Oprah Winfrey shrugging as if to say, "I told you so".
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I TOLD YOU SO.

3. You’ve had to postpone a spell because you can’t seem to find the right materials anywhere.

A GIF of Winifred from the movie 'Hocus Pocus'. She's making magic over the cauldron.
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How am I meant to make a dreaming tea if mugwort is never in stock in my town?

4. You invite your Tinder dates over to read their tea leaves or tarot cards.

A GIF from the movie, 'Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban'. Professor Trelawney is encouraging Ron to read his tea leaves.
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Witchcraft and chill. What better way to get to know your date?

5. You try to sneakily find out your crush’s time of birth so that you can calculate their natal chart.

Kim Kardashian lurks behind a bush. She looks like she's sneaking or eavesdropping.
Popsugar

Just ask them straight up, and tell them you’re into astrology. Their reaction will be more interesting than their rising sign, I promise.

6. … and then you cry when you realize their chart is totally incompatible with yours

A scene from Baz Luhrman's 'Romeo + Juliet'. Romeo, played by Leonardo di Caprio, is crying and shouting, "I defy you, stars!"
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I believe wholeheartedly in astrology, except for when it tells me some hard truths.

7. You have longed to find a coven of your own.

A GIF from 'American Horror Story: Coven', wherein the coven of witches are walking down the street, dressed in black.
Digital Spy

Some witches, known as solitary witches, practice on their own. The rest of us prefer practicing magic with a coven.

8. You get annoyed when people call the #MeToo movement a “witch hunt.”

A GIF of model Naomi Campbell saying "Don't compare yourself to me ever".
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Abusers are not witches. Comparing a time where women were abused and murdered to a time when abusers were being held accountable is ridiculous.

9. You spend all year looking forward to Halloween.

From the movie, 'A Nightmare Before Christmas'. The character is saying 'There's only 365 days left 'til next Halloween!'
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It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Not only is Halloween around the time of some sacred witchy festivals, it’s also a great opportunity to be surrounded by spooky, otherworldly aesthetics.

10. You have to hold yourself back when a guest puts their keys or coffee mugs on your altar.

A gif from 'Bridesmaids'. A child is sitting on a couch, saying 'You're making me uncomfortable.'
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It’s not a table – it’s a super sacred space! Don’t pollute it with your bad energy.

11. Lana Del Rey’s new space witch persona truly speaks to your soul.

Lana Del Rey in her music video for 'Love' from the album, 'Lust for Life'. She winks and smiles at the camera.
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The idea of Lana living in the Hollywood sign and blessing us with intergalactic, witchy tunes is so comforting. Nothing but respect for MY president!

12. You panic when you suddenly remember that the moon is full – and you haven’t left your crystals out to recharge.

A GIF from the movie 'Practical Magic'. Nicole Kidman's character is saying, "Blood on the moon. Where's my tiger's eye? No, no, no."
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Waiting for a whole new month to cleanse and recharge your crystals is too inconvenient.

13. Your bookshelf is full of esoteric books and witchy fiction.

A shot from Snow White, where the evil queen is looking through her bookshelf of magic-related books.
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The ultimate dream is to own a library full of books about runes, Paganism, Wicca, tarot, herbs, astrology, sigils, numerology, moon phases, candle magic, crystals, and more.

14. You wanted your cat to be a familiar… but they keep knocking things off your altar.

A big, fluffy cat knocks a glass off a coffee table.
Huffington Post

They might not always be great sidekicks when it comes to magic, but cats are truly some of the best companions ever.

15. You spend too much time scrolling through the #witchblr tag on Tumblr.

A GIF from 'New Girl'. One character, Nick Miller, is saying "It is perfectly fine to go on Tumblr all day."
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…and mentally bookmarking spells, rituals, and books to try.

16. When it’s Friday the 13th, you’re both excited and scared.

Michael Scott from The Office saying, "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."
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I never know whether I should feel very lucky or very unlucky. Either way, I’ll definitely pet a black kitty if it crosses my path!

17. You love casting protection spells over your friends and watching them live their best lives.

A GIF from the movie 'Practical Magic'. Sandra Bullock's character is blowing a candle before a spell.
We Heart It

Even if your friends don’t believe in witchcraft, there’s something beautiful about lighting a candle for them while wishing them well.

18. You’re tired of people using the word “witch” as a pejorative.

A GIF from The Simpsons. Lisa Simpson is dressed like a witch. She is saying, 'Why is it when a woman is confident and powerful, they call her a witch?"
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If you call me a witch, I’ll take it as a compliment. Thanks!

19. Meeting other witches brings you an infinite amount of joy.

A gif from the movie "Monty Python and the Holy Grail". The scene is set at the Salem Witch Trials. A character says, "More witches!"
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There’s nothing like coming out of the broom closet to someone who’s also witchy.

20. There’s nothing more satisfying to you than getting a spell just right.

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Not to mention how smug you feel when you figure it out!

21. Misrepresentation of witches in the media upsets you.

The witch from The Wizard of Oz
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Most of us aren’t remotely evil or even scary. Plenty of witches try to use their powers for the greater good!

22. You have a loving, supportive community.

A GIF from 'Sabrina the Teenage Witch' where three witches are performing a spell around a cauldron.
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Even if you practice witchcraft without a coven, there are plenty of witches out there who care about you. The community can be the most magical thing about witchcraft.

Sian Ferguson

Sian Ferguson

Based in South Africa, Sian is the proud parent of three cats and numerous pot plants. In addition to working as the Assistant Love Editor at The Tempest, Sian is a freelance health journalist. She has been passionate about reading and writing for as long as she can remember, so working as a writer and editor is a dream come true for her. In her spare time, she loves cooking, baking, and learning about astrology.

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