Weddings

Halal dating may just make people more interested in getting an arranged marriage

Maybe arranged marriages aren't SO bad.

Whenever anyone talks about arranged marriages my first instinct is to cringe and think about all the things that were wrong with it. I couldn’t understand why two complete strangers would commit to spending the rest of their lives together. I am barely comfortable changing my clothes in front of some of my friends, so I could never imagine being so intimate with someone I only met recently.

[bctt tweet=” I couldn’t understand why two complete strangers would commit to spending the rest of their lives together. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

Conversations about marriage started coming up in my family as my sisters and I got older. Some of my family members would sit my older sisters down and tell them about how they heard about some guy from their friend who knew a woman, who knew another woman, who had a cousin whose son was looking for a wife. My sisters hated the idea of being set up, but they reluctantly accepted every time.

Since it worked out for so many women, they thought it would be a good idea to try. It’s common for family members and friends to introduce two people to who are both looking to settle down.

They would meet the men and their families and sit down for conversations to get to know each other more. This allowed them the chance to get to know the guys before they decided whether they were interested in them.

Sometimes they don’t even want to meet them for a second time, and other times they see potential.

[bctt tweet=”Sometimes they don’t even want to meet them for a second time, and other times they see potential. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

The younger generations in Muslim countries are becoming less conservative because many of them want to marry for love. They are choosing to let go of tradition, so many have opted to try “halal dating.”

[bctt tweet=” They are choosing to let go of tradition, so many have opted to try ‘halal dating.'” username=”wearethetempest”]

Halal dating is a modern version of arranged marriages where the couple can spend time together and get to know each other before deciding to commit. This is being practiced by families who still want their children to maintain traditional Islamic values, but at the same time understand the need for young couples to get to know each other before they committing to something as big as marriage.

Let’s call it: The Bachelor: Halal Version.

[bctt tweet=”Let’s call it: The Bachelor: Halal Version.” username=”wearethetempest”]

The cheesy romantic in me prefers to hopelessly fall in love with someone before being swept up in the overwhelming tide of marriage, but I’m happy that this kind of dating exists. By allowing Muslims to get to know each other before marriage without having to feel like everyone is judging them, we are giving these marriages a better chance at success. Besides, Islam does encourage that two people get to know each other even only slightly before agreeing to the marriage.

I think a lot of young women find this to be a great way to meet possible partners instead of having someone they barely know forced upon them. This way, they can discuss their likes and dislikes, future plans, hopes, and dreams, and form a bond.

Hopefully, more people will realize the importance of allowing young people to get know each other before they make a serious commitment.

  • Tamara Abueish

    Intersectional feminist majoring in Journalism and Women's Studies at the American University of Sharjah. When she isn't running the Women Empowerment Club at her university, she enjoys reading, watching movies and going to the beach with her friends.