Love, Humor, Life

10 absurd items you never knew you needed

You thought pizza made you happy? What about a pizza pillow?

It’s winter. The world is cold and ugly and depressing. You’re stuck indoors all the time. So what better thing to do than look on Amazon for ridiculous, hilarious, absurd amazon items that you really don’t need but that would make your life so much more cheerful?

1. Pop-Up Hot Dog Toaster

Nostalgia HDT600RETRORED Retro Series Pop-Up Hot Dog Toaster
amazon.com

This is genius.

2. A Pizza Pillow

16" Novelty Pizza Cushion In Pizza Box
amazon.com

Mmmmm, don’t you just want to cuddle up with a warm, snuggly pizza, but without all the mess?

3. Fish Pop Molds

Zoku Fish Pop Molds
amazon.com

You could make ice pops that look like fish! I mean, if that’s not a dream come true I don’t know what is.

4. Potato Definition Poster

Potato definition *, college dorm room decor, dorm wall art, dictionary art print, office decor, minimalist poster, funny definition print, definition poster, inspirational quotes
amazon.com

Everyone can benefit from a quality dictionary definition.

5. Umbrella Buddy Wall Hooks

Umbra Buddy Wall Hooks, Set of 3, Brights
amazon.com

Are they functional? They could be, or they could just be cute little men hanging around your house.

6. All My Friends Are Dead

amazon.com

Why not buy yourself a funny book about dinos? You don’t need to be a kid to enjoy this gem.

7. A Talking Toilet Paper holder

amazon.com

Do you need this? No. Do you want it? Yes!

8. A Hedgehog Cheese Grater

koziol KASIMIR Hedgehog Cheese Grater, transparent anthracite
amazon.com

It could serve a purpose, but should it? Probably Not.

9. Pizza Lights

Kurt Adler Indoor/Outdoor 10-Light Pizza Light Set
amazon.com

I’m a bit hungry, can you tell?

10. Potty Unicorn Spray

Squatty Potty Unicorn Gold Toilet Spray, Mystic Forest, 4 Ounce
amazon.com

Everybody uses the potty, why not go in style?

So snuggle up in bed with a cup of coffee and your laptop and shop for some absurd Amazon items!

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Meagan Foy

Meagan Foy

Meagan Foy is a student at James Madison University studying English with minors in Italian and Writing, Rhetoric and Technical Communication. She is originally from Newtown, CT. She is the Editor of the Life section. She can be reached at meagan.foy@thetempest.co.

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