This week, in a nod to the people standing in lines at all over the Western Hemisphere, the hashtag #GiftIdeasForPoliticians took off. In any other year this might have been simply a tongue-in-cheek commentary on people’s general low-level disdain for those who make our most important decisions. Instead, the Twittersphere unleashed 18-months worth of pent-up rage and disgust.
1. Just how deep is this hole? Are we sure they can’t crawl back out?
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians Hey come here. Take a look down in this deep black hole. Your presents are down there, now lean over…..
— BRIAN H KEARNEY (@BrianHKearney) December 14, 2016
Coal. (It's their favorite.) #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— We the Freople (@wethefreople) December 14, 2016
3. Honestly, the fact the Flint water crisis is still ongoing should make every politician in the country hang their head in shame.
— Black To Live (@BlackToLive) December 14, 2016
4. Would this help?
✔️Our Bodies, Ourselves
✔️A science lesson
✔️A class on how women's bodies work
✔️Respect for women's bodies&rights
— NARAL (@NARAL) December 14, 2016
5. Maybe they’ll understand the importance of water in the context of their real estate value.
Fill their pools with oil. They LOVE oil. #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Music is My Sister (@TurnVinyl) December 14, 2016
6. Also known as “2016: A History”
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians collected edition of Orwell
— Messiah Haynes (@IlikeBIGbuttand) December 14, 2016
7. This might actually work.
A lie detector collar that shocks them when they lie. #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Dork Power (@Dork_Power) December 14, 2016
— Craig Wilkins (@KeswickPinhead) December 14, 2016
9. Given the abuse of religion which some politicians have made their bread and butter, I don’t think this would help.
A gift certificate for a tattoo of the Ten Commandments #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Have a Merry MST3K (@MST3K_4_Life) December 14, 2016
10. This is a popular choice…
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians Walls surrounding them.
— #HashtagGamer (@Hellish141) December 14, 2016
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians vasectomy, so next generation's IQ will double
— Dana Gold (@DanaGeezus) December 14, 2016
12. If we’re lucky, the Wicked Witch might kidnap them on their way to get it.
The Wizard of Oz "If I only had a heart/ brain/ courage/ decency/ humanity" Kit #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Lori Grannis (@StalkMeOnce) December 14, 2016
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians Someone standing over their shoulder at doctor's appointments deciding if they can have a medical procedure or not
— regdog (@TierzaChels) December 14, 2016
14. If that doesn’t solve our deficit problem, nothing will.
#GiftIdeasForPoliticians a lie jar but instead of a small jar it's the size of a large hotel that should fix some of the money situation
— Nicole de Lagneau (@Catgirl1224) December 14, 2016
15. MORE YES.
Cash salary no more than the Federal Minimum wage. Then they can truly say, "I identify with the common worker." #GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Frater Ralph (@Frater_Ralph) December 14, 2016
16. Just try to keep that image out of your head.
A sex doll so they can screw something other than the Middle Class for once.#GiftIdeasForPoliticians
— Jethronomics (@Jethronomics) December 14, 2016
17. Is this a once size fits all deal or what?
— Capt. Zac (@Capt_Zac) December 14, 2016