Love, Advice

Here’s a simple guide to finding your BFFs

You shouldn't think you’re the only one who likes to meow your questions and hiss out your irritation.

We were made to create, love and be loved, and to share all the beauty that is in us with the rest of the world.  We are here to add glow and sparkle to the beautiful vortex that is called life and watch it spiral in all its glory.

We cannot do this individually, and we are not meant to. To make the most of our existence and live long, happy and healthy lives, we need to find people who resemble us, whose heartbeats coincide with our own, and who love being around us as much as we love being around them.

Even if you are a self-proclaimed “loner,” you’ll still need a tribe of loners to lone together. That’s just how we’re wired to function, and that’s something we can’t change.

[bctt tweet=”We’re here to add glow and sparkle to the beautiful vortex that is called life. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

Sometimes, many of us have difficulties in finding like-minded people. We think finding them is just a matter of coincidence and not something we can control. They couldn’t be more wrong – because finding your tribe is indeed something that you can do yourself.

1. Know yourself.

First things first, you can’t connect with someone else until you actually discover who you are. But if you still feel lost, that’s ok. We’ve all been there at some point, and it’s a feeling that can come on and off during the span of our lives. Reflecting on how to find yourself can be the subject of an entirely different article. But for now, let me tell you this; try out everything that gets your attention until you find what really ignites your soul and makes you lose track of time. And yes, that includes stuff you think is really trivial or no one else appreciates. Odds are that there are thousands out there who share your passion. Dig it out, dust it and claim it, because this is a big part of who you are and it’s beautiful.

[bctt tweet=”You can’t connect with someone else until you actually know yourself. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

2. Be yourself, unapologetically!

To find your tribe, you need to be yourself authentically. You like sappy songs and foreign movies? So be it. You have problems with mainstream culture? Stay as you are, and be proud of it. You have been put on this earth with a unique set of characteristics that you are meant to embrace and project, not fight against. You are not just allowed, not just encouraged, but required by nature to be you. And as long as you are staying true to yourself, you’ve got to take yourself to the public realm and find others who are just like you.

[bctt tweet=”You’ve been put on this earth with set of characteristics you’re meant to embrace. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

3. Believe that your dream crew is indeed out there.

Now, listen. You shouldn’t think that you’re the only one who likes to meow your questions and hiss out your irritation. Rest assured that there are plenty of others who absolutely enjoy drinking kale juice just like you do and they don’t think that it’s the worst idea ever. Believe that you will run into your tribe one day and know that they could be anyone one – that guy in IT whose voice you’ve never heard, or that girl in the neighboring class who doesn’t even speak the same languages as you do. That’s also to remind you – never judge based on appearances.

[bctt tweet=”Rest assured that there are plenty of others who like similar things. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

4. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there.

“Out there” where?  Clubs, fairs, book clubs, classes, church groups, mosques, or workshops. Basically any assembly of people who seem to do something you like. Easy peasy. But remember, not all of them have to become your tribe members. They can absolutely love what you love but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you guys can spend time together. As to who can bang your drum with you, well, I will leave that to your own judgment because you will know them when you see them.  But all I can say is that you will most definitely find a couple like-minded buddies in each group you join. Just remember not to be shy. Project yourself and wear your heart on your sleeve because they won’t know you by sense of smell.

Unless, of course, you guys are both vampires or something.

[bctt tweet=”Not everyone is going to become your BFF. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

5. Make it your mission to find your tribe.

Like anything else, if you’re not mindfully persistent about it, it won’t take happen. Set your heart on finding your tribe and really mean it. Then, go out into the world and do what you love and be incessant, be intense, and take it to the effing extreme. You might not find the right people right away.  But have faith that God, The Universe or whatever you call the higher force you believe in, will soon bring it to you. Just mean it before you start acting on it and enjoy it until the people you share it with come along.

[bctt tweet=”Go out into the world and take it to the effing extreme. ” username=”wearethetempest”]

6. Once you find them, keep them close.

You definitely don’t want to let go of the gems of people you just unearthed. But, life is tough and we are busy all the time – sometimes too busy to spend quality time with ourselves, let alone spend it with others. My two cents is to not let your hectic job and responsibilities get to you. You have an equally important responsibility towards yourself besides earning a living, and that is nourishing your soul and enjoying the company of people you like. No matter how busy you are, you can always make time for the things you want to do.

So do yourself a favor, and get out there and enjoy life.

  • Mona A. Moneim

    Mona Abdel-Moneim is a full-time copywriter at a branding agency and a former university teacher with an MLitt in the study of Muslims, Globalization and the West from the University of Aberdeen, Scotland. Besides learning the guitar and polishing her writing skills, she is now focused on her voluntary work in Education. She loves cats, Cadbury's Crunchie, deep conversations and everything indie.