Milo Stewart is a non-binary, trans, asexual, aromantic q*eer YouTuber “who doesn’t care about your cisgender feelings.” Their videos discuss everything from trans allyhood to finding your pronouns to dealing with popular holidays as “ace” and “aro” people.
“Aromantic people can kind of take the back end of Valentine’s Day celebrations,” he explains in one of his videos. “Because it’s just not really a holiday that I’m really able to celebrate. Unless I take to be just, show your love — like, your platonic love — for your friends.”
“So when people argue in defense of Valentine’s Day, it often comes off as very ignorant to the existence of aromantic and asexual spectrum people,” they explained to The Tempest.
Their first encounter with YouTube was when he started watching silly videos like The Annoying Orange. They later found YouTubers like Laci Green, whose videos introduced them to the realm of online feminism.
The 17-year-old first started making videos with a collab channel associated with their high school’s Gay-Straight Alliance. When the excitement died down and the other members weren’t posting as much, they continued, eventually moving on to their own channel.
We spoke to Milo about their journey with their gender identity and inclusion of asexual people in society.
You identify as asexual, aromantic and non-binary. How did you come to identify with those labels?
I started questioning my sexuality in like 8th grade. As I got older I realized there was a difference between how I am attracted to people versus how others are attracted to people. About a year ago, I started identifying as nonbinary.
Do you have any personal preferences as far as who you are attracted to?
I don’t really have like preferences. I just want your face next to my face so we can cuddle.
What was it like when it came to accepting yourself as asexual, aromantic, and nonbinary?
It was at first hard to be like, hey, you’re not a heterosexual girl. YouTube was what sort of helped me normalize my identities. My internalized transphobia was initially hard to get over.
What would asexual inclusion in society look like as far as romantic holidays and occasions go?
It would include a lot of ironic puns and finding a way to celebrate the little things and not necessarily the over romantic gestures. You can be a little romantic in platonic relationships.
Is there anything you wish people knew about the asexual community as a whole?
You can have a happy fulfilled life without sex. There are so many other ways to enjoy life. Our culture shows sex as a part of adult relationships; having sex doesn’t make you an adult.